...my legs gave way under me while I was bringing my carer's lunch in from the kitchen.
The conversation when he saw me crawling along the floor went like this:
Steve: "What you doing down there?!"
Me: "My legs gave way underneath me"
S: "Why didn't you shout?"
M: "Because you're usually asleep"
S: "Fair comment <chuckle>"
Means I won't be able to make myself a soup or hot choccy this afternoon though, in case I end up on the floor again, so my entire calorie count for the day will be under 500 calories and my carer's count is already getting on for 2,000 thanks to the spread I used on his toast this morning (530 calories per slice), 4 slices of bread (about 100 each slice) and the crisps and biscuits he had when he didn't think I was watching are a few hundred more, minimum.
Apparently I don't make any of his meals or drinks and don't do anything to support him though 😞