Wednesday 22 June 2022

Mornin' all

How are you all doing this morning?

I'm doing OK, can just feel myself shrinking back into the person I was when I was being bullied and a*used is all.  Everything gets blamed on me and when I try and defend myself I'm called a liar and "you shouldn't say things like that" and "I never said that at all" etc etc.  Every penny I get goes on lending it to other people then never being paid back.  The majority of the things I buy are mainly or entirely for others and the favours I do for them get taken for granted and I'm given deadlines to do the favour in with no recognition for the effort and time I put in to doing it for them.

Today is gonna be a pretty much calorie-free day 'cos of the weekly virus scan and backups but Steve will get 3 full meals again.  I've had potentially my only calories today in the chia seeds and that's it for the rest of the day.  I've got some dairy-free ice cream that I can have along with lashings of maple syrup this afternoon, after I've made Steve's lunch for him and put my external hard drive away.  When he wakes up I'll go and get him his breakfast, then I'll take my pills, then take his bowl out to the kitchen and give the plants and seedlings their first drink of the day.

The virus scan is running and I've got a book to keep reading and reviewing as well as another one lined up for afterwards.

I've just booked our grocery delivery for 3 weeks' time so that's all sorted now.

Aksherly, I might take my morning pills now, so that it's one less thing to do while Steve's eating his breakfast and I can just water the plants and seedlings while he's eating his first meal of the day and I'm going hungry.

Not gonna do the news again today - I've already got too much on my plate and I've gotta be ready to wake Steve up and keep him awake ready for his phone appointment with a medical bod in a few hours' time.

OK, that's my morning pills popped and 3 squirts of the B12 spray, so hopefully they will keep me going throughout the day now, while I'm going hungry.

Steve's just woken up so I'll go and do the watering while he's in the bathroom for at least the next half an hour, then I've gotta remember to charge up my FitBit.


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